This is a true story of something that happened to the author’s mother. Luckily there was a positive outcome but it could have been very different. UTIs (Urinary Tract Infections) affect both men and women of all ages. In the elderly it may be diagnosed as dementia because of the mental confusion and incontinence that can accompany the infection. For more information check out Health Canada’s website http://bodyandhealth.canada.com/channel_condition_info_details.asp?disease_id=234&channel_id=2015&relation_id=95775
“You don’t understand. They’ve taken all my money and I’m broke. I made bad decisions and now I haven’t got anything left.” The elderly woman stood timidly near her bed, picking at invisible lint on her nightie, her eyes darting quickly around her room, looking like she was preparing to run.
The younger woman moved to stand in front of her. “No Mom, you’re fine. Everything’s still the same.” Or was it?
Susan had arrived from the airport after hurriedly packing and flying out on the earliest flight she could arrange that morning. It turned out her mother had a number of falls, falls that no-one was aware of until now. Susan received an email from her daughter Paula saying something was wrong with Grandma. She got the email minutes after returning from a month in Mexico. She knew Paula would keep in touch with everyone while she was away and take care of any issues if necessary.
“Grandma’s always talkative, Mom. She wants to know what’s going on. She didn’t even want to talk to me this time! Something’s the matter.” Paula confided in her mother.
Susan called her mother.
“How are you Mom?”
“Fine.” Silence.
“What have you been up to?” Susan prompted.
“Nothing.”
The answers definitely weren’t normal for her mother. She usually had lots to say about everyone.
“Mom, have you been feeling okay? Have you had the flu, or fallen, or anything?” Susan’s concern was growing.
“Well, I shouldn’t tell you but you’ll find out anyway. I had a fall.”
“Just one fall?” Susan asked. Now she was really worried.
“Maybe more than one.”
“How many Mom?”
“I don’t know. But I’m all right now.” The voice on the other end of the phone sounded timid and breathless.
“I need to see that for myself. I’ll be down as quick as I can.”
“I can’t pick you up at the airport though!” The elderly woman started to sound panicky. “The lights on the car aren’t working properly.”
“It’s okay Mom. I’ll get there by taxi.”
“But Susan, I can’t afford a taxi!” It seemed like she was crying over the phone.
“Please try not to worry. I’ll be there shortly and I have the money for a taxi.” Susan hung up and immediately called the airline.
What was going on with her mother? She was okay when Susan left for Mexico. Of course, February was always a grey time of the year and her mother hated the Vancouver rain. She had good neighbours and friends in her complex that she went out with on a regular basis. She was even planning a trip to visit a friend in New York in the next few months. What had happened?
Susan arranged her flight and after getting packed, phoned her boyfriend to explain what was going on.
“Listen, I can drive you down there tomorrow, if you want,” he offered.
“Thanks, but no thanks. You’ve got your business to run.” Ron had joined her in Mexico the last week of her holidays. That’s all the time off he could take because he’d been so busy.
“Okay, I’ll at least drive you to the airport in the morning.”
Susan was on the plane by 6 AM and less than two hours later she was knocking on her mother’s door. Her own key wouldn’t work for some reason.
Her mother let her in.
“Hi Mom.” Susan gave her a hug and then backed away to look at her mother.
“You really didn’t have to come, Susan. I had a good sleep and I feel fine now.”
Susan looked closely at her Mother. She wasn’t fine.
“Well, I decided to see for myself. Remember, I was on holidays so we haven’t visited for awhile.” Susan looked around. The place was a mess. There were even dirty dishes in the sink. There were never dirty dishes at her mother’s house.
The elderly woman glanced wild-eyed at the younger one standing in front of her. She reached out with her cold fingers, hoping to hang onto something she could trust. Nothing was real anymore. She made mistakes trusting others and now she would pay dearly.
Susan grabbed her hand and held it tight.
“I told you, Susan. There’s nothing left. It’s all gone. Everything.” She mumbled and began pacing from her bed to the door and back again.
“Mom, if you can’t settle down, I’ll have to take you to the clinic to see your doctor.”
“No. He doesn’t understand either.”
“Listen Mom, have you had any breakfast yet? Susan asked. “I haven’t and I could sure use some. By the way, what happened to the lock on the door? My key wouldn’t work.”
“I fell and broke the door. We couldn’t get the lock working after that, so my neighbor replaced it. We fixed the door as well as we could but I know they’ll make me replace it but I can’t afford anything.” She whimpered once more.
Susan took a big breath and helped her Mother over to the table. An hour later she had fed her a substantial meal. Her Mother certainly had a good appetite and ate as though she hadn’t eaten in weeks. After helping her with a bath and checking out her numerous bruises, Susan suggested the two of them go out to the bank.
“They are stealing my money from me Susan.”
“Well, then I think it would be a good idea if I had my name put on your accounts and we can check out your safety deposit box.” Susan had talked to her siblings the night before and they all decided this was the best thing to do until they found out what was happening to their Mother.
The paperwork took awhile but they finally made their way back to the car. It was already 2 oclock and time for lunch.
“Did I do okay, Susan? Did anyone catch on?”
“Catch on with what Mom?”
“You know. The way I was. I know they are robbing me blind. You just wait.”
“Okay Mom.” Susan worked with people who had mental and developmental disabilities. She wasn’t about to buy into her Mother’s paranoia. It was obvious that there was some serious issues going on in her Mother’s mind.
They went for lunch and then picked up some groceries and headed home. The afternoon and evening were uneventful. Susan cooked dinner while her Mother tried to watch TV. About 10 PM they headed for bed.
Susan’s Mother was wide awake and pacing back and forth and whimpering. Susan looked at the clock. It was 2 AM. She groaned and got up.
“Mom, what is it? What’s wrong?” She immediately noticed her Mom’s glassy eyes and shortness of breath. It wouldn’t be long before she began hyperventilating. Susan reached out to check her Mom’s pulse. It was rapid and thready.
“Mom, I have to take you to the hospital. We can go in the car or I’ll call the ambulance. What way do you want to go?”
Her Mom looked blankly at Susan. Her daughter repeated her question. She remarked, “The car,” and let out a sigh.
After days of testing it was discovered that Susan’s Mother had a urinary tract infection, very low sodium, potassium, and B12 levels, as well as low thyroid levels. The falls that she had were a direct result of low levels and UTI affecting her balance. The infection and low levels presented like the onset of dementia. Had she gone another month (she had been dealing with the problems for at least 5 months) it would have been irreversible. As it was, the doctors were unable to determine what all was wrong the first time she went into the hospital. She was diagnosed properly on her second visit to the emergency ward. Her family refused to let her be signed out until they had figured out what all was wrong.
She was put on antidepressants and went to stay with family until she was strong again. Then she moved into an assisted living facility. There are still some residual effects like poor balance occasionally so she uses a walker now. Once in awhile she still gets a little anxious too about her financial situation even though the family has explained everything is fine. Her doctor has kept her on a very low dose of antidepressants in case they have to start her on a higher dose again.
She has become an advocate for others who are showing signs of what she experienced. She’s already made a difference to a couple of people. Unfortunately it was too late for one of her good friends, who died from the same symptons while Susan’s Mom was recuperating with the family.
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